Just Some Random Crap Not Involving Holiday Cheer, Or The Worthless Co-Worker For A Change

I hear you folks, really I do as you traverse the mall lamenting the fact that stores are decked out for Christmas already and Halloween hasn't gone by yet. It is ridiculous. (I'm somewhat proud of the fact we don't do this until the day before Thanksgiving.)

But when you raise your voices and decide to tell the peon who works in a particular store your thoughts about this travesty you're wasting your time. They're simply following rules and store policy. Berating them makes you look like an idiot. If this is a true beef you have may I make a suggestion here?

(Of course I can, it's my blog.)

Simply ask for the address and/or phone number to their corporate headquarters. Convey this message to those @$$holes. They're the ones calling the shots. Believe me, we're behind you 100%.

While voicing, or writing your displeasure, there are a few other things you could mention as well. We'd absolutely love you to pieces if you'd let them know how much the following is ridiculous as well:

1) Black Friday should be abolished. Not the entire day, just the ridiculous start of the day. Trust me, getting up at 3:30 am in the morning to be at the store by 4:30 am isn't something I really look forward to. Since we're open 12 hours a day as it is that should be plenty of time to get your shopping addiction in for deals. We might even be capable of pulling off a smile or two that day if we didn't have to get up so damn early in the day. Plus people die that day from your ridiculous stampede for deals, which really aren't deals anyway, every damn year. And the people who camp out all night in front of a store? Total fruit loops of the highest degree.

2) Holiday music doesn't need played from November 1st through the first week of January. While you may wax nostalgic about hearing a Christmas tune from long ago you haven't heard in awhile we're shell shocked by the 2nd week of November.

3) The twelve days of Christmas also need abolished as well. Those twelve days are the ones leading up to December 25th in the retail world. You know the ones, where we're open 18-20 hours a day because you don't possess the ability to get your shopping done in the normal 12 hours a day we're usually open. We have no sympathy for you. As I once asked my parents, two full time working parents with 5 children mind you, if they ever had trouble getting their shopping done back in the dark ages when stores were only open 8 hours a day, and rarely on weekends, the answer was no. It can be done. Get your shit together.

4) Parking. We're ordered to park miles away as far as possible from the mall during this period. While there is validity behind this, because after all, we're trying to fleece you out of as much money as possible this time of the year, you could also raise one tiny issue for us here as well. Shoppers rarely get the "good" parking spots anyway. We have a rather large population of mall walkers, who never shop the mall, they simply walk the mall. Trust me, we have them identified. How much sense is it to allow people who want to walk, park the closest to the mall entrances, so they don't have to fucking walk. We'd love to see their asses towed away.

In closing, raise your voices to the right people. But to tell you the truth the right people are essentially you, the inept and spoiled shopper. If you weren't sheep none of this would occur in the first place. You're the ones who enabled this "corporate greed" you wail about by your actions, and/or inaction. Feel free to cast away your cloak of hypocrisy. Or just simply get your shit together. If you're unable to manage that, keep your mouth shut around us, we're really not interested in hearing about the "corporate greed" you're actually feeding.