The Before You Forget, You Better Write About It Post

I'm getting a bit forgetful.

Actually that's not entirely true. Males have the forgetful gene installed and wired at birth. It's a defense mechanism of sorts. It's used to irritate the female species in our lives.

Prior to falling ill early last week there were a couple of posts involving work.

One being the asshole customer who refused to accept the terms of our return/exchange policy.

The other involving the (ex)Worthless Co-Worker.

The asshole customer:

I predicted he'd be in within two days to make the purchase he refused to make during his illustrious demonstration of stupidity. He waited six days. Naturally I wasn't there to see it. The boss said the asshole didn't utter one single word throughout the transaction. Meh -- I don't have time for babies so I'm glad I missed it, somewhat anyway.

I did see him yesterday though as he walks the mall daily. I gave him a wave and smile. He started to wave back until he recognized who it was he was starting to wave back to. I think he hit himself in the balls when he jerked his hand back down.

The (ex) Worthless Co-Worker:

My forgetfulness isn't totally the reason for the delay in posting about her. I was hoping she'd pop back in because I didn't get to hear all of her sordid story when she came in originally to beg for her job back.

Her litany of complaints:

1) He sucks in bed. My only input here was to defend the guy. She didn't appreciate it when I told her perhaps he thought she had a dick. Usually there's sucking involved was my reasoning. My only other question was to ask her how long it took her to figure out that "he sucks in bed." Her reply was, "the very first day." Yup -- she did certainly crawl into bed with a guy she's never met in person before, on the very first day she met him.

2) He's not wealthy. She seriously bought into that line apparently. He promised to buy her a Lexus and she finally figured out that wasn't going to happen. (See next item, for further clarification.)

3) They met at a hotel, and they spent her first three days there because he wanted to make her arrival in New Mexico "special." This was first thought of, by her, as pretty special, and a sign of his wealth. On the fourth day he took her to his home. His home has wheels since it's a mobile home. So yeah, his wealthy status took a hit there. (Although I've heard the 1974 Marshfield mobile home was cutting edge in the day, apparently the original worn out orange shag carpeting turned her off.)

(Oh... and before someone decides to be offended... I really don't have anything against mobile homes, but residing in one doesn't shout out "wealth" to me.)

And no, she still hasn't run away from the guy at this point. Her reasoning involved thinking that since he's recently divorced this is just a minor setback. The mansion is still in play in her mind. (And probably the Lexus too, but that's just a guess on my part.)

4) Apparently he never answers his land line. His justification for this was because he didn't want to speak to anyone and take time away from spending time with her. This was naturally considered sweet at first, until she answered the phone at some point when he wasn't around. Hello. Bill collector here.

5) All of his friends are creepy and unemployed. Since he was off the entire time she was there I'm thinking he is as well. This part of the conversation was missed by me though. Damn customer's who wanted help interfered here.

So she finally fled and came back here. From what I've gathered not too much wiser though. She's going back online to meet her next "spiritual husband."

It's a shame she hasn't stopped back in though. Some of this is second hand information gathered from the boss. He's the one who got to actually talk to her and I was too busy to catch all of this tale of woe.

Maybe she'll stop back in some day, when we're not as busy the day she did last weekend. I'd certainly like that to happen because she's hilariously stupid and shares everything. My blog would appreciate it as she's been handy blog fodder. Time will tell I guess.