Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Juvenile Antics At Work

I've discovered you can say almost anything to customers at work that you're having fun with. I love people like that. (Heavy emphasis on the word "almost.")

A nice young lady who'll I'll refer to as Anita has been in and out of the store for about a year debating about ordering one of our products. (The reason for referring to her as Anita is quite simple, that's her name, duh.)

Anyway, I like her and she's goofy as hell, but seriously interested in buying. I just knew it was going to be a matter of time before she pulled the trigger. The other reason for liking her is that she always asks for me, and when part of your wages are based on commission, you like to be requested.

(Hey, I'm a nice guy and all, but money talks.)

Last Sunday Anita walks in, locates me, and says it's time to order. As we walk to the back register counter the following conversation takes place:

Me: So you're going to go with what you've been lusting after for the last year, right?
Anita: Yes!
Me: I just wanted to make sure, in case you changed your mind. We wouldn't want to order the wrong thing.
Anita: Nope, I haven't changed my mind at all.
Me: Good, I'll just have to get some information from you then. What's your full name and address?
Anita: Oh, you need my full name?
Me: It's helpful, so yes.
Anita: Oh gawd. Promise me you won't laugh.
Me: Um, okay.
Anita: My full name is Anita Nicewanger, my address is.....blah, blah, blah.
Me: (as professionally as possible) Can you repeat......
Anita: NO!!!
Me: ....your address for me so we don't ship this expensive item to one of your neighbors?
Anita: Oh, sorry, sure.

So we finish up the transaction paperwork and payment method.

Anita: I want to thank you for not laughing at my name.
Me: Not a problem Anita. You're married, right?
Anita: I am.
Me: So you got what you wanted then, right? You have to admire that.
Anita: OH! MY! GAWD! I never looked at it that way, that's hilarious and something I can use to the assholes who make fun of my name. I'll just tell 'em I got what I wanted. This will be an ego booster to my husband too. I knew I always liked dealing with you when I came in here.
Me: I've always liked dealing with you too Anita. Now can you leave so I can laugh?
Anita: You're such a kidder.

And off she went, and happily I might add, with my laughter floating after her as well.

39 comments:

Dazee Dreamer said...

man, what did I do before following your blog?

Sam said...

hehehehe-wow she's great-I love laid back ppl like that-and I commend you for not laughing immediately that must have been tough b/c that's one hell of a name...

BeMistified said...

That is awesome. It is great to have nice customers, I second that!

Just Plain Tired said...

Dazee Dreamer -- Um, I dunno?

Sam -- Very tough, I know I had to have had a grin on my face though.

BeMistified -- I figured she could take a joke. She was always goofy when I talked to her in the past.

Smart Ass Sara said...

I love people who know they are a target for humiliation. ;) But yeah...I'm not sure I would have changed my last name. BUT I will say that I had a hard last name (Koceja) which nobody can say or spell and I was thrilled to get Strand. YET.. nobody can spell it. I get asked EVERY TIME on how to spell my name. WTF?

Mustang Sally said...

omg ... kudos on not losing it when she told you her name. Being warned by her asking I may have been able to hold back, but not and continue to talk LOL.

Great story!

MichelleLCSW said...

Ah...it makes the days at work much more pleasant when you can actually have fun with folks like that!!

I've got to ask, JPT, were you perchance an English teacher in a previous life?! Your blog is great fun to read.

Just Plain Tired said...

Smart Ass Sara -- Now Strand would be no problem for me, I'd have struggled with Koceja for sure. ;)

Mustang Sally -- The warning was definitely what held me back.

MichelleLCWS -- You gotta have fun at work. No teaching experience here, but certainly glad you enjoy the spewage I create here. :)

KlayeBlayk said...

Another blog post enjoyed. :) I think I'm beginning to love your work. :P

Just Plain Tired said...

KlayeBlayk -- Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it, and stuff. :)

Charlene said...

If that really is her husband's name I don't understand why someone at some time in that family didn't change it to Jones.

Anita said...

That's funny. You're very quick...immediately came up with something that makes her feel better.

Would I have taken that name...don't think so. :)

Just Plain Tired said...

Charlene -- It's real, I'm assuming anyway. I think I'd have changed it myself though had it been my name.

Anita -- I'm thoughtful like that, and stuff. ;)

Another Day of Crazy said...

That's true love, when you take that for your name!

And true professional cool factor as well, I would have totally choked trying not to laugh.

Just Plain Tired said...

Another Day of Crazy -- I had to be pragmatic about it, for a bit anyway, there was about $110 in commission involved. ;)

Alicia said...

Now I'm really curious about what she was buying... What does somebody who already has a Nicewanger at home buy themselves?

Miss Melicious said...

That is definitely an epic last name...right up there with the Kuntsman's from around here. Good for you for turning her slightly negative into a laugh your ass off positive!

Just Plain Tired said...

Alicia -- Even a Nicewanger needs our product occasionally. ;)

Miss Melicious -- We like everyone to leave our store with a positive feeling, and stuff. ;)

KlayeBlayk said...

Hey, it's me again. Thanks so much for your daily amusing stories and your faithful drops, I thought I'd give you an award.

http://achildsinnocenceklaye.blogspot.com/2010/10/versatile-award.html

Steph said...

Haha... that's hilarious. I would have lost it.

The Blogger Formerly Known As said...

I’m interested to know if she had any middle names? Likes A?
The enigmatic, masked blogger

Just Plain Tired said...

KlayeBlayk -- Thanks, I'll be by to see it soon.

Steph -- Thanks!

TBFKA -- Wouldn't that have been something. ;)

aims said...

maybe they can pretend they're the Nicewanger superhero family?! ;)

Just Plain Tired said...

aims -- I think she left the store feeling like a superhero, does that count?

Khaye said...

You're definitely hilarious!

Just Plain Tired said...

Khaye -- Aw thanks, and stuff. I try to amuse, not sure I hit hilarious very often though.

darev2005 said...

You are the consummate professional and quick on your feet. Me, I would have giggled uncontrollably.

One year my mom met a woman through her office whose last name was Hogg and her first name was Ima. Made me want to track down her parents and slap them repeatedly. Then she compounded the problem herself by marrying a man with the last name of Betch. Oh lawsy.

KLZ said...

That's almost too good to be true. I believe you but....damn.

Just Plain Tired said...

darev2005 -- That poor, poor woman. ;)

KLZ -- It is hard to believe. Definitely the strangest name combo I've run across in 8 years doing this job.

Lady Jennie said...

What a cute and funny story - good line on your end, I might add.

Just Plain Tired said...

Lady Jennie -- Thanks! And I did laugh, but I'm sure she didn't mind at that point. ;)

Christy said...

Hahahaha that is just AWESOME! Go you and go her!

Just Plain Tired said...

Christy -- I think she left pretty happy anyway. ;)

Jessica B said...

omg. that is probably the toughest name to be saddled with ever! LOL. However, I'm sure her husband got a lot of curious "action" with it...

Mustang Sally said...

I giggled about this all day yesterday and had to read it through again today ... and noticed something nobody else mentioned.

You said her first name was Anita. Just say Anita Nicewanger a couple of times quickly. Really, try it ...


Ah need a nice wanger


LMAO I'm bent, I know. But you couldn't make this shit up.

Mrs Midnite said...

Lol great, very quick response, thanks for your comments on my blog. Hadn't realised I'd not looked you up. Pleased I did, funny post!

Sarahf said...

Hahaha! That's hilarious! If she was willing to change it when she got married, I have to wonder what her maiden name was.

Sandra said...

You have the quickest wit on the block mister! When you said to her that she was coming back after what she'd been lusting after, I was sitting back, thinking the porn music might kick in!

tiburon said...

This is easily the greatest story I have ever heard.

EVER.