Thursday, October 14, 2010

The Things That Do Actually Amuse Me About The Worthless Co-Worker

I think it's time to lighten things up a bit in here. So here's a few things about the Worthless Co-Worker which amuse me.

(Your amusement may vary wildly from mine though.)

I remember the day the day the manager stalked out of the stock room/break room and asked me if I ate his container of cashews. I think I just stared at him without replying. He then figured out who ate his cashews. His unopened by him cashews as a matter of fact. All that was left was the empty container for him to stare at.

So he confronts the Worthless Co-Worker about this, and to her credit, she fesses right up to it. When asked why she would do that her reply was, "You can't leave food around here, especially when I'm hungry. What do you expect me to do when I'm hungry and too broke to buy my own food?"

(For the record my food is apparently off limits though. She knows what my reaction would be I guess.)

She made a friend the other day at the mall. We have a recently opened kiosk in front of our store. Some gold buying scam outfit by the looks of it. There's a tall leggy blonde who works their part time who Worthless Co-Worker gushes over. Apparently they have deep "spiritual" conversations. As per the Worthless Co-Worker's words, "she's a Christian, unlike me or the boss."

She's a stripper. I had this figured out the first time I saw her. This leggy blonde uses her "stage walk" as she struts back and forth in front of her kiosk. While I personally have nothing against that noble profession the Worthless Co-Worker was beside herself with this knowledge. (Because yes, she had to immediately go out and ask this girl if it were true.) Needless to say they're no longer friends.

And then there's the last incident where she left the store key at home and called me to come out to the store to lock up for her. You know the incident, where the boss forbade her from calling me out to do this?

When I asked her why she called me, when he didn't want her to do that, her reply was "He didn't forbid me from calling you. All he said was that he didn't want me to call you. That's not the same thing. He knows he has to be more clear than that with me."

That's the reality of working with this delusional person. So yes, on occasion she does amuse me.

27 comments:

Khaye said...

Hahaha!!! I love her "guts"!!! Really... She doesn't even seem so bothered with her attitude - not thinking how it might affect others... Just being herself!!!

Just Plain Tired said...

Khaye -- Actually I think she's self centered and self serving, more than gutsy. These were just mildly amusing incidents to me.

Khaye said...

I agree... Well, it's just that sometimes as "real" people, we often not get what we really want to happen because we always think about how others would feel or how our decisions might affect them. But this co-worker of yours has a different mind of her own!!! She's funny - but I believe that she's very upsetting to work with. Reading your posts about her just makes me think if I'm her co-worker, I could have just squeezed her neck!!!!Hehehe

Laura H said...

I'm just impressed by your stripper detection skills :)

Gail said...

Your patience is beyond me...but then again, I seem to have customers in the same catergory.

Just Plain Tired said...

Khaye -- I've eyed her throat a couple of times. ;)

Laura H -- Well, that in itself could be a blog post. ;)

Gail -- I guess I do have a lot of patience. But in this case it's pretty easy. She has little to no effect on me. I have no responsibility for her actions. I just watch the train wreck daily. ;)

darev2005 said...

Is there any possible way that you could have her secretly sterilized so she would never reproduce? I don't think we could stand a whole lot lore contamination of our gene pool.

Just Plain Tired said...

darev2005 -- Oh yeah, she definitely wants kids. Her thoughts on that would make a great blog post now that I think about it. ;)

Dazee Dreamer said...

I'm actually glad that I'm not the only one that has someone they can blog about. Because I'm so loving worthless co-worker. Not her, but your writings of her. I have a scaryman here that we could line her up with. :)

Megan said...

I'm glad you can see the humor in it - I think having such an annoying coworker would drive me bonkers!

JY said...

I am wondering how long this "mild amusement" will last!

Charlene said...

She's supposed to be a good Christian and she doesn't want a friend who's a stripper? Oh the hypocrisy!

That analysis of the boss "not wanting" vs. "forbidding" would indicate she would be a good defense lawyer.

The Empress said...

Ohmy gosh, the word twisting on that one.

People just shock the heck out of me, they always will...

Scarlet Ily said...

She sounds like she could be a sneaky one, and a little clueless when it comes to social situations. How could she ask the leggy blond if she was a stripper(?). Too funny!

Smart Ass Sara said...

God bless equal opportunity.

Alicia said...

Sorry if you've already covered this, but how old is this girl? I kind of want to punch her...

michelle said...

Have you ever thought if maybe boss and cwc are kinda 'close', you know. Romantically, sexually- whatever. After all, it wasn't like she was punished for eating his nuts. Ooops! Pun slip.

No but really?

Sam said...

a very interesting look into the mind of a self-absorbed lunatic!
5 stars! ;)

Sparkling Red said...

GAH! I just read yesterday's post too, with the "brokeness" and the "8 pairs of non-negotiable shoes". Would you like me to come by your work sometime and strangle her personally?

Just Plain Tired said...

There's almost too many comments for me to remember to respond to. I hate having to work early shift. I know someone wanted to know her age, and that's 30. And no, I'm pretty sure she's not sleeping with the boss. He's the "very" married type of guy, which is a good thing.

Anyway, thanks for the comments folks. They're always appreciated. And tomorrow's post will not involve the Worthless Co-Worker, for a change, I think, maybe.....

Mustang Sally said...

Laughing about it is the only sensible thing to do IMO. And I agree, this type has no guts at all. That's why they take no personal responsibility for their own actions. They never even think about any point of view but their own.

LOL my verification word is "skambita" if you add a ch in there (you know you know where) you could coin that word for her 'personality type'.

Just Plain Tired said...

Mustang Sally -- Where, where? lmao. Very apt word verification modification. ;)

blueviolet said...

That one is gonna be bit by karma but good!

Just Plain Tired said...

blueviolet -- I suspect so myself.

Sarahf said...

Hahaha! She's hilarious, until I remember she's not fictional.

tiburon said...

She is batshit crazy. And that makes me love her.

Mrs Midnite said...

I'm amused but scared. We have a hot desk office at another site. One of my co-workers, quite worthless, had left a chocolate buiscuit there. I e-mailed him thanking him for the emergency chocolate and ate it. Does this make me the same as WCW.