Sunday, October 24, 2010

The Love Of The Worthless Co-Worker's Life

The Worthless Co-Worker is in love and has a man in her life. Of course this man is someone whom she's never met though, but nevertheless she claims that they're spiritually married. They "met" on some whacked out, off the wall, and loony tune Christian site on the Internet, as well as on Face book about one year ago. Their relationship consists of text messaging, phone calls, snail mail, and Yahoo messenger.

Since she's not very bright one of the stupidest people I've ever met I learned long ago not to offer much of an opinion, or advice to her about this insane "relationship" as she's the type of person who has to learn everything the hard way. She's not smart enough to realize she should be running as fast as she can away from this guy. While I say very little about this to her myself, the boss is beside himself with her ignorance.

He's a pretty nice guy and likes to play the role of "lecturing dad" when it comes to her. I find this highly amusing since he's only 9 years older than her, and it's a waste of time. Her latest revelation has kicked his "lecturing dad" persona into high gear though. She's invited her "spiritual husband" up for Thanksgiving and apparently he's accepted the invite.

(And no, the boss doesn't want to get in her pants. He's happily married, almost sickeningly so, in some people's opinion. It's just the way he is and he hasn't had the opportunity to play "lecturing dad" at our location as often as he did at his last location before he transferred here a few years ago. The staff  he had there was a much younger group than he's had here over all.)

Saturday was a day of listening to them argue about her ignorance about this guy. Like every stupid person I've ever known she shares all details and revelations about this guy. Here, in no particular order, are the reasons she should be running away from this guy:

1) He lives in New Mexico, but all mail she receives from him seems to originate from Tennessee.

2) He has four children, three of which he claims aren't his naturally. (The Worthless Co-Worker feels it's so unfair that the legal system makes him pay child support for the "three that aren't his.") His story is that his ex-wife cheated on him. I've seen a picture of him, with all four children surrounding him. They're carbon copies of him. Exact. Carbon. Copies. All of them.

3) He has nothing to do with his children, which is a fact I do actually believe. His reasoning/justification for this, not so much. His explanation to the Worthless Co-Worker is that since he lives in New Mexico (with a crazy mail service from Tennessee, see item #1) and his ex-wife and children live in Tennessee he doesn't want to confuse the children by being a part of their lives. Naturally this is an accepted and quite plausible reasoning to the Worthless Co-Worker.

4) He's a world traveler. Even when he's in Japan, or Guam, as he's professed to be, all mail seems to still originate from Tennessee. Naturally this is another easily explained phenomenon. While he has nothing to do with his children he states he still gets along with his ex-wife. They get along so well that he first mails correspondence to the Worthless Co-Worker to his ex-wife, then the ex-wife mails it on to her.

5) The Worthless Co-Worker cannot call him. All calls have to originate from him. Oddly enough these phone calls always occur very early in the morning, or very late at night. Of course this is also easily explained as well. Since he's a "world traveler" with a crazy work schedule and life, he has told the Worthless Co-Worker if she calls him she may wake him up. Once again the Worthless Co-Worker sees the reasoning behind this as well. She'd feel horrible disturbing him because he "gets so little sleep."

6) The guy has three felony convictions. One for grand theft auto. (Naturally he was framed.) One for domestic abuse, again innocent as hell, and one which the Worthless Co-Worker hasn't shared as of yet. But she knows he's innocent and the legal system has unmercifully been unfair to him.

7) The Thanksgiving invite. Since he's a world traveler and his "company" is woefully behind on expense checks, he can't afford a hotel for Thanksgiving when he comes up here. (Along with the unfair child support as well.) So he's bunking with her apparently.

I think you folks get the picture and that's the intelligence she possesses. The boss and her argued all day long about this. My only input was to ask if she planned on bringing this fine specimen of a Christian out to meet us that weekend. I was told no. The boss and I are not "Christian enough" to warrant meeting him, as per her words.



KlayeBlayk said...

Wow, that's so stupid, LoL.

Just Plain Tired said...

KlayeBlayk -- That's life with the Worthless Co-Worker. ;)

ChiTown Girl said...

I think it's great that your company gives jobs to the mentally handicapped. Kudos to you! ;-)

Just Plain Tired said...

ChiTown Girl -- That's definitely one way to look at it. ;) But... hey! I'm not...well okay... maybe I am mentally handicapped myself.

Charlene said...

Let's all pray that the worst thing tha that happens is he comes for the visit and takes her for a few hundred bucks.

She needs to have a herd of good friends on speed dial so when she calls for help she has ten guys show up to overtake this criminal, tie him up and put him on a greyhound to the end of the line.

She needs a pack of condoms for he seems fertile and lord knows what kind of disease he might have.

darev2005 said...

I just hope for her sake she doesn't end up in a large trash bag in a ditch somewhere. But even if she doesn't end up dead and just snookered, she'll do it again, so why bother? Sheesh. If it weren't for stupid people, I would be out of a job.

Dazee Dreamer said...

Can't wait for what she is going to tell you when he "just can't make it to Thanksgiving". She's willing to have cyber sex with this dude, but she is homophobic. we need to see a picture of her.

Smart Ass Sara said...

Well with any luck, he's a complete pyscho and maybe he'll kidnap her and leave her body in parts along the highway as he drives off in her car after stealing anything worth anything in her house.

And to be honest- that might actually happen.

My old boss met her husband on the internet (she told us on her first day on the job) and they are a terrible pair. She's nuts and he was a 51 year old virgin. *sigh*

Gail said...

Poor idiot, hope she survives the holiday.

I think I would guess from all this, he is (A) still living with his family or (B)he is in prison...some people have no sense at all! But then that is what you've been saying.

BeMistified said...

Having gone through the "meet people online" phase, I would never do it again. I didn't get the point until a couple of stalkers later and a psycho boyfriend. LoL ignorance is a body bag waiting to be filled.

Anonymous said...

Wow, this Worthless Co-Worker sounds just like my ex-sister-in-law ;-)

You can't get sound reasoning through the thick skulls of people like that. Then when the relationship goes sour, you & the fatherly boss will be the ones she cries to about it.

Poor girl...

Jane said...

Maybe you should give her a box of condoms as an early Christmas present. Something tells me he's not going to show. Hard to get released from jail or get that ankle bracelet off, even if it is the holiday.


FallDown Girl said...

Aw, jiminy....that's just sad. I hope for her sake the worse she ends up with is a broken heart....maybe she'll gain some world smarts along the way?

Miss Melicious said...

haha! You're such a hater...all of these things are so easily explained! Yeah, right...oh well, she probably deserves a little crazy town in her life.

Mustang Sally said...

Jeez, what a bimbo.

It reminds me of the movie The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, supposedly based on a true story. Went to see it years ago (not the recent remake which I haven't seen). I have to tell you, if it really went down the way it did in the movie ... the bitch was just to stupid to live.

I mean come on, at one point he leave them tied up in a barn. She gets loose and runs off into the woods. It's night, she has a 10 minute head start. When he goes looking for her ... with a chain saw running mind you and I repeat IT'S DARK ... the only thing he had to do to find her was follow the screams.

I was so riled I stood up in the theater and yelled at the screen "Shut UP Stupid!!" lol I didn't use to be as laid back as I am now *whistles*

You can't help stupid. But it's hard to even drum up sympathy for willful ignorance.

Kassie said...

wow. that is all i have to say about that.

Sam said...

She really is impressivly stupid. Wow. I feel sort of bad for your boss in that he seems to think that she can be 'reasoned with' which clearly will never happen. She's going to have to learn this lesson the hardway-but at the rate she's going I think the lesson plan might include her being chopped up into a million tiny pieces and put in a Hefty Bag...
She really is borderline retarded.

simply kim said...

oh.. that's outrageous, lol!

Just Plain Tired said...

Charlene -- I think her family is on high alert for this visit. But the ones I've met are fruit loops as well.

darev2005 -- That's why I say little to her, she wouldn't listen anyway.

Dazee Dreamer -- Sorry, pictures would probably be a bad idea. She's not ugly by any means though. My son, who is just a few years younger than her has actually said she's good looking, until she opens her mouth and speaks. ;)

Smart Ass Sara -- She's simply oblivious when it comes to thinking in those terms.

Gail -- You are possibly right.

BeMistified -- I'm not into the internet dating/relationship thing myself.

Vickie Heully -- Definitely a thick skull on this girl.

Jane -- I shudder at the thought of her reproducing myself. ;)

FallDown Girl -- Yeah, I'm hoping that's all that happens too.

Miss Melicious -- She has plenty of crazy in her life. A lot of her own doing as a matter of fact. ;)

Mustang Sally -- You nailed it. Stupid can't be helped in most cases.

Kassie -- Wow is enough. Especially if you've read about her previous exploits here. ;)

Sam -- Perhaps just a bit more than borderline actually. ;)

simply kim -- I agree, and then some! ;)

Sarahf said...

Oh dear. I'm starting to worry about WCW's safety. But her stupidity does make me feel guiltily better about my own cock ups.

Just Plain Tired said...

Sarahf -- You know, she's 30 years old, refuses to listen to common sense, and is determined to learn everything the hard way. Not much a person can do about it. Plus I don't have the patience to deal w/her idiocy.

Jean said...

You are a great story teller. I loved the read but don't believe a word. LOL!
Please keep writing because it is very entertaining!

Just Plain Tired said...

Jean -- Glad you like the read, but sadly very true. In my 50 years on this planet I've never met anyone so out of touch w/reality, and not institutionalized as her. It's truly mind boggling.

Nakamuras on Saipan said... can't make this sh*t up can you? Sheesh..thanks for giving me a good laugh ....and I thought I had to deal with dumb arses...feel sorry for you-but at least it's entertaining. I was thinking maybe this guy is a jail-bird?

JY said...

Waiting to see what this "guy" is really like....and hope this story doesn't end up on one of the CSI series.....!

Just Plain Tired said...

Nakamuras on Saipan -- I suppose you could make this up, but why bother when its right there in front of you on an almost daily basis.

JY -- I think we all know what he's really like, except for the worthless Co-Worker. ;)

The Blogger Formerly Known As said...

Sounds like true romance to me.

Silly girl!
The enigmatic, masked blogger

dddiva said...

Wow. Just wow. I don't even know where to begin. There are more red flags in this story than at a bullfighting arena. Thanks for sharing, sometimes it's good to know no matter how screwed up we think we are- well... I'll be kind and leave it at that. ;)

tiburon said...

I am loving worthless coworker more and more. Mostly because she entertains me. And I dig that.

The Empress said...

I think he keeps her drugged at all times...NO ONE can be in such denial.